ISU Purity Test

The Purity Test, which has historically served as a segue from O-week to true college life at Rice, has now been updated for college life in Ames
It's a voluntary opportunity for students to bond and track the maturation
of their experiences throughout college.

Caution: This is not a bucket list. Completion of all items on this test will likely result in death, expulsion, or failure to graduate.

Have you ever...

Cross Lincoln Way at Welch Avenue?
Spent all of your dining dollars in the first month of the semester?
Actually attend DIS?
Had Jeff's Pizza?
Met someone from Des Moines who goes home every weekend?
Been hit (or almost been hit) by the CyRide?
Woken up to a dorm fire alarm?
Survived Helser Hall during a heatwave?
Been locked out of your dorm room?
Been in Towers while they are swaying?
Been ambushed by a Lake Laverne goose?
Swam in Lake Laverne?
LARPed on central campus?
Lost your student ID, only for someone to post it on the Snapchat Story?
Rode the Moonlight Express?
Heard someone “doing it” through the dorm walls?
Had sexual intercourse in the dorms?
Walked all the way across campus for the primary purpose of sexual intercourse?
Made the Walk of Shame on a weekday while everyone else is walking to class?
Walked barefoot across campus?
Raw dogged the dorm showers?
Juicy Wiggled?
Witnessed Hilton Magic?
Had a hatred for Big 12 refs?
Tailgated?
Summited mount Cy?
Made a hate week banner?
Attended a CyHawk game? (FTH)
Been to Iowa City without vomiting?
Snuck into Jack Trice?
Gone to Thielen Health Center and actually received proper care?
Been confused by Workday?
Watched Butler videos?
Failed Lib 160?
Had a lecture crush that you never talked to?
Switched your major to something Easier?
Switched your major to something Easier and still struggled to pass?
Dropped a class?
Had a non-platonic relationship with a professor?
Pulled an all-nighter? (either academically or alcoholicly)
Made it to your 8 am after a night out?
Gone to class hungover?
Gone to class drunk?
Faked sobriety to your parents on a weekday?
Blacked out during the pregame? (Directed towards my roommate)
“Danced” at a party/bar without leaving room for Jesus?
Slept through 8:01 am on 801 day?
Remembered the entirety of an 801 day?
Sung all the words to Dixieland Delight?
Dartied in February?
Been impaled while playing beer darts?
Played beer die?
Kissed a non-fraternity brother?
Kissed a fraternity brother?
Not received a bid?
Pledged a frat/sorority?
Participated in YLH?
Snuck into a frat party?
Stole something from a frat?
Been denied from a frat party?
Been to THE pairing party?
Wanted to replace a certain fraternity house with a Canes?
Finished a Superdog?
Ate a Kum Dog?
Been to Mugs night?
Been denied from AJs?
Had your fake taken by a bouncer?
Participated in an Ames bar crawl?
In a lofted twin XL bed?
Won trivia at Paddys?
Enjoyed some refreshing Ames tap water?
Been on drunk highway?
Dorm stormed?
Been in Ames for the Summer?
Named a borg?
Done a keg stand?
Pulled trig for someone else?
Drank wine straight from the bag?
Threw up on your first Zyn?
Successfully completed Edward 40 hands?
Found the 5th Loko? (Finish 5, 4-Lokos in a night)
Been admitted to Mary Greely?
Spent the night at Mary Greely?
Been to Perkins at 4 am?
Been issued a parking ticket on campus?
Questioned by Ames Police?
Ticketed by Ames Police?
Arrested by Ames Police?
Received an MIP in Ames?
Used your Tinder pick-up lines in your family group chat?
Pissed on the floor of your room? (Also directed towards my roommate)
Made it on Barstool ISU?
Rode the ram?
Ran Curtiss to Beardshear?
Met Wendy?
Been Campaniling?
Cried about graduating?
Walked on the Zodiac?
Done it with Cy?
Participated in the Veishea Riots?

Disclaimer: This website is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or in any way officially connected with Iowa State or Iowa State University. All content is for entertainment and parody purposes only.

Your score: